Oasis

We all wake up in the morning and get ready for whatever lays ahead of us
Work
School
Preparing breakfast
The list goes on and on
Everybody does something different, but the point is, we all do something
The day sometimes flies by and next we know it
The day comes to an end and were laying in bed, slowly falling asleep
Yet there is some people who's days drone on
I know as a high school student I can't wait for the day to end
Just so I can get home and out of the old creaky building
Some like what they do
Some don't
And those that don't have a lot harder time getting through their day
and being happy.
There is so much misery in this world that it is hard to contradict it
Staying happy constantly is almost like defying gravity in a sense
We need help
and lucky for us, life does supply it
We all need oasis's in our life
There would be no way of getting by with those little oasis's that we hope for
strive for.
The oasis of family, of your wife/husband, of your kids
The oasis of the simple hello, friendly gesture, or high five
The oasis of Religion
Whatever your oasis is
life will always supply them
So when you are having a bad day
or just feeling down
Make a list of oasis's that you have been blessed with
and then you can create an oasis
of your own.

Observations

I walked into the classroom in silence
I arrived ten minutes late, and knew I would suffer the consequences
My car had broken down, leaving me to getting a ride from my parents
Nobody noticed as I snuck into the back seat of the classroom
My friend sat slouched over with her head cocked to one side staring at the board
It was apparent that she was not focusing
I could not see her eyes
But the fact that she was twirling a pencil and shifting her shoulders to the left told me she wasn't on the board
but rather staring out the window.
I shifted my gaze to my peer to the left of her
He was staring contently at the teacher
His gaze was unpeneterable
He found this subject fascinating
You could tell by the change of wrinkles on his forehead
that every word uttered by the teacher was processed and affected him hard
I listened to what the teacher was saying
While keeping my gaze fixed on him
The teacher was discussing the fact of relationships at teen ages
Every time the teacher uttered the word love, or relationship
I could see him cringe and sink lower into his seat
This then brought my gaze to his girlfriend across the room
She was sitting slouched over with her arms on the desk in front of her
She let her chin rest on her forearms
Her gaze focused on the wall in front of her
She was deep in thought as you could see her eyes twitter back and forth
The subject was hitting her hard also
And the thoughts weren't happy
They were troubling
I made a mental note to ask my friend about her in the next class
and then moved on
My friend shelby tapped me on the shoulder and asked where I was
I answered his question he patted me on the back and went back to doodling
his writing was light and quick
the circles and scribbles showed no consistency
and created no picture
He was simply content
He was having a great day and was very happy
I smiled knowing he always is content
not very often do I see him with a frown on his face
The bell rung loudly startling a few in the room
I gathered my belongings and made my way out the classroom door

Scars

As I walked into school I tried my hardest to hide the one thing about me that I wanted to keep from everybody.
My Scar.
It was an ugly thing,
It protruded from the skin, almost as a mutant
It started by my elbow and ran up my arm to my shoulder
The whole scar was sharp to the touch
I wore band aids over band aids trying to cover it up
and eventually it worked
I would wrap it with layers upon layers of moleskin
The bump would still show
But luckily nobody looked close enough
to notice the scar protruding from my skin
I went by every day
and nobody asked about it
I was succeeding
I was hiding
After a time passed
I started to question my actions
Would people understand if I didn't hide the ugly scar?
Or would people see me as a freak?
Then one morning I decided to unwrap the moleskin
and show the world the ugly protruding scar
I went by school and people looked at me differently
They stopped talking to me
I was outcasted
However a few people did accept me
These few people were the only reason I kept the scar unwrapped
I kept the scar open for a good month
I went home one day and went about my day as normal
Then as I walked past my mother my scar brushed against her skin
It cut her deep and I watched the blood trickle down her arm
Staining her skin as it ran down in thick drops
I stared in horror
I ran out the door and immediately drove to my best friends house
I talked and talked to her
but as I walked out the door the scar brushed against her back
It cut through her shirt
and deep into her skin
the blood again trickled down her back
collecting in the threads of her shirt
Staining her skin and clothing
I slowly took steps back as I watched her stare at me in horror
She called my name, and asked me why I even took off the moleskin in the first place
I did not respond
I didn't know how to
the reason was selfish
the reason was mean
Put it back on she said
Put it back on.
Hide it.
I ran away in tears.
I immediately went home and took out the moleskin
I wrapped it twice as much as usual
Never again was I to show this scar
It has caused to much pain
Too much grief
And too much sorrow
I watched the scar disappear under the moleskin
Never again
Never again
Will I show this part of me to the world
Maybe it is better to hide this from the world
Maybe this wasn't really part of who I really am
Wether it is or not
I know one thing
It will never be shown to the world again.
Never again do I want to bring that amount of pain to people
Never again do I want to stain people in that way
Tears filled my eyes as I wrapped the moleskin over my scar one last time.
Never.
Again.

Confidence

Confidence is not something that is fallen upon, it truly takes a lot of work to reach the point of truly being "confident" in yourself. During life there can be so many events that affect this confidence that we have in ourselves. While we are children we think we are the best thing on the face of the planet. We also think we have the best parents in the world and we make sure to tell them through notes. I still remember some of the coolest moments is when I walk into my room after a hard day and find a note on my pillow from my little sisters saying three simple words, I love you. It means so much and I don't think they understand what a profound effect it has on me and my attitude towards that day. I really feel like i'm doing something right and if they can write on a piece of paper that they love me, I had to have done something to make them feel that way towards me.

Then as we grow older we graduate from elementary school and enter middle school. A person's middle school years is often referred to as the worst years of their life. We all are growing and are starting to get acne and then puberty on top of it all! We don't know what is happening to us or our feelings. We are lost and have a hard time of knowing what to do. So after a day of spilling milk on my lap, earning a crude nickname, and getting your books hit out of your hands going home can sometimes be a great relief. Eating with people that wont judge you for spilling milk on yourself and interacting with people that will help you pick up your books rather than cause them to end up on the floor. And then again, as you enter your room seeing that pink paper on your pillow brings a smile across your face. You open it up and read three simple words, I love you.

After we finally overcome the years of middle school we hit high school. High school is where we start gaining that confidence in ourselves like we had when we were a child. We start to discover who we are and what we want to become when we're older. These years are crucial to our future and we feel the pressure of that. We know that the grade you get in that AP class you take can make the difference of getting into college or not. You start making friends and know who you want to be with. Then comes the even more added stress of dating. Just a couple of weeks ago my friend asked a girl on a date that he has liked for years and she said yes! The joy on his face expounded from every pore. He walked around with his chest held high and his shoulders raised almost to his ears. He planned what movie to attend and the exact car he was going to drive. Then that night she texted him. "I'm sorry, but I don't like you like that." The truth hit him hard. He threw his plans out the window and sucked in his confidence. He didn't accomplish anything, he says to himself. No girl is ever going to want to go with him, he has no chance, he repeats to himself all night. He has little confidence in himself at this moment, in that split second, with that one text message, all was lost. Our confidence hangs on a thread. It ultimately depends on our surroundings.

Then after a long day of school we return home. To some they go home to a house of turmoil and abuse. No comfort is found anymore and that once "best parent in the world" has turn into a monster. And then there is some of us who go home to a house of love and care. That parent is still important to us and we still love them dearly. Then as we retire for the night we see that pink slip on our pillow and pick it up. We read those three simple words, I love you. Those words bring a smile and tears to our eyes. We sit on the side of the bed and read the words over and over again. Someone cares about me. I am doing something right. And we tell ourselves this all night. Even as we close our eyes, we can see those three words on the back of our eyelids, I love you.

To know someone honestly cares about you can go so far. To have someone say good job today, you rocked that paper. To have someone simply comment on your dress that day can truly make their day. Our confidence soars when we are hit with the simplest compliment. So watch people and watch their mannerisms. If you see a slight frown or a slight slouch, reach out to them and compliment them. Their day will be made and instant results will be seen. And I know that that one compliment will be not taken lightly, rather taken as a lifesaver, or as a confidence saver.

To Be Proud

To be proud of something takes trust, knowledge, and love.
It takes a lot of work and time to create pride,
and just a split second to lose it.
When it's lost, everything is lost.
Not knowing how to act, feel, live.
They painfully remember when they were eligible of someones pride.
Seeing them look at you
With a smile on their face
Knowing that they are proud of who you are, and what you do
When all of that is gone, you lose direction
The path back to your life before is a long and hard one
And even if you do make it back
There will always be that part of you that no one will ever be proud of
Not even yourself

Care and Farmland

Care. The word has such positive meaning. She or He cares about me, they care a lot about me, the word truly shows affection. Yet just because someone cares about you doesn't mean they're in love with you, or love you period, they just care about your well being. Some people have a more caring outlook, and some think about the next step to revamp their house or which color of snuggie they're going to buy for their dog. Is there a such thing as caring to much? or to less? You don't often hear people tell you you're caring to much, but that doesn't mean it's never heard. Some people have a hard time letting go of things and really become emotionally attatched. Like myself for example. I become emotionally attatched to people or objects and have a hard time of letting go. There are just people that their main goal in life is to care about other people. The persons are the people that make our best friends and become the most influential people in our lives. So what happens to the people that don't care? They become the people who succeed in business. They're the lawyers, the CEO's, they are the wealthy upper class. I had the opportunity of interacting with a wealthy environment and a middle class environment. The attitudes of the population is completely polar opposites. When we see the movies with the old western town where everybody knows the sheriff and is on personal terms with everyone, this isn't fiction, it's true.This last week I got to visit a farmland out in Branchville, Wisconsin, and for those who have never visited, the total population is 834. The city is small, yet when we talked to the farm owner, they knew when their neighbors cousin's wedding was! It's incredible how close people are when they don't have the media we have! It truly is a dream to be able to live with people who have so much love in their hearts, and truly just want what is best for you. No catches, no benifits or returns that are needed, just pure care. As we run through our lives we never stop to smell the roses, never sit down and just talk to someone, and no, Instant Messaging on facebook doesn't count. It would truly change the dynamic of your relationship with the people around you. Try it, sit down and bring someone to lunch, let them know you care, and you will be surprised how great of a friendship will grow out of it.

Our Past

Everybody has one, and some can be something they're proud of, and some it brings back painful memories. Everybody's past is unique in their own way, no two are the same. Even if you were to look at twins there would be big differences in their lives, which creates them and their personality. If it weren't for our past we wouldn't be where we are now. For some of us where we are right now isn't the best and we blame it on our "mistakes" in the past. If we really consider each event we wont see mistakes in our life, just a life changing event. These events lead us on the journey called life. A mistake is defined as an error of action, but is it really an error if it makes us who we are? Sure we beat ourselves over the past but in the long run that one event might not even matter. And if it does, there is always the present to fix it. There is no such thing as mistakes in our past, our "mistakes" are just choices that someone doesn't agree with. It's a matter of opinion. Now this doesn't mean that we should take people's opinions on our past lightly, we should review them and make sure to change what we did for this person and never do it again, especially if they are someone that is close to you. You can't change the past, but you can change what you do right now. If you wronged someone go back and give them a hug, apologize, and make the future opposite of what the past is. Then when the future becomes the past you can look back and realize, you changed your past, and it's increasingly getting brighter. The feeling of this spreads a smile across your face and nothing feels better than looking on something and being proud of it. Being proud of who you are and what you've done, is one of the best feelings a human can ever experience. So strive for the feeling, fix your past, and smile at what you've done. Anybody is capable of reaching this point, it's only a matter of taking action.

New Blog

I have now started a blog posting information about breaking news in kenosha! Believe it or not, things are happening in kenosha. The Website is www.newsinkeno-where.blogspot.com Enjoy!!!!!

April Fools Day

I'm am very sad to admit that this prank was not played by me, but on me. Since the  beginning of the school year I would make fun of my friend Curtesia for liking this guy, and she would always say she'll get me back. She never did, until April 1st. Again she told me she's going to get me back, and I took no thought of it. The whole day passed and still no prank! I then went to Jazz band. Now for those who don't attend my school, I don't have a lock on my locker, AND my locker had duct tape in it. Two major mistakes, I don't know how I could be so stupid. So my four friends, Christian, Curtesia, Macie, and Shelby finally got me back. I came back from Jazz band and my WHOLE LOCKER was taped with duct tape, making it impossible to open. I tore off all the tape, which took about 10 minutes. Then opened my locker  to find nothing. My stuff was gone. I was shocked, this isn't supposed to happen to me! I'M the one who pulls these pranks! I searched all my classes and eventually found my belongings. My gym bag was in a garbage can, backpack in Curtesia's locker, and my binders sitting under a desk. Once I found everything I left to track practice. I then realized that I never found the Duct Tape. I came to school the next day and three peoples lockers were covered just as mine were, and surely enough, their stuff was missing too. 

Band Class

So this last month my band teacher gave us a 15 measure song. He told us to transpose it and then memorize it. He gave us a whole month to do it, so i figured, it can't be that hard, so I put it off. (Mistake #1). Then the week of the test comes around and I don't even have it transposed yet, let alone memorized. I was hoping he would give us some type of extension, YEAH, keep wishing Baxter (Mistake #2). I transposed it Monday night. The test was Thursday. I then proceeded to forget about it (Mistake #3). Then Thursday comes around and he announces that he will be testing us in 20 minutes. I started freaking out. I quickly jumped in the hallway and played through it over and over and over again. I managed to memorize half of the song. He then proceeded to bring out the camera and told us to play in front of it. Everybody then began thinking, he won't be watching us, why not cheat! But of course the teacher was smarter than that. He then asked, as he said, a responsible student to make sure no cheating will be going on. And guess who he picked, ME! I immediately felt guilty. So everybody played in front of the camera and I quickly found out, I was a lot better off then some of these people. I played and then half way through nobody was coming. Thats when me and Christian started talking how bad of a mood our teacher was going to be in when he watched these, why not make his day. I have always sung an arrangement of When the Saints Come Marching in. It required two people and was very creative. I taught it to Christian and the show was planned. We then performed the song in front of the camera and it turned out hilarious. We had the whole class laughing, but our teacher still didn't know. Class ended and life went on. The next band class came around and our teacher talked to us about how horrible our tests were, he then said he will give us one more day to memorize and hopefully, get a better grade. Then he went on and said, but all I have to say about the playing tests... "Oh when the saints! Go marching in!" The whole class erupted into laughter, "That definitely made my day, that was awesome." The plan went across really well! And we got an extra day and I took the test again and Aced it. The week finally turned out... thanks to one song.

"How YOU Doin'?"

So when my brother got his cell phone he has been getting calls from someone looking for Matt. Time after time he tells them that this is the wrong number but yet they still manage to keep calling. Yesterday they called again and my brother told them Matt wasn't there and hung up. They called right back. He answered the phone and gave it to me. So from my view I figured that someone was prank calling my brother and he wanted me to prank them back. So I immediately said, "How you doin'?" My brother started laughing with me along with him. Then the person responded. "Good!, thank you sir, how about yourself?" It wasn't until then that I realized, crap, this is a real person meaning to have an actual conversation. I felt like a complete idiot. I just sat there trying to hold in a laugh. We sat there in silence as I tried to come up with something to say. I eventually gave up and just hung up the phone. Well one thing is for sure, i doubt the Matt he is looking for talks like that. I don't think we will be getting any calls again.

Valentines Day

So friday is dedicated to valentines day that day because the actual day is on saturday, how lame is that!?! So I decided to go all out. We went and bought a pink t shirt and then came home and put my own design on it. So I had three candy hearts saying hug me, be mine, and kiss me. I got a lot of compliments and everybody loved it. This was only the start of my valentine day adventure. The real fun was actually on valentines day. Our family made cookies and delivered them to people, ringing the doorbell and then running away. We left a card so they knew who we were but it was still fun. One of the best comments of the night is, as we were driving away my mom said, were lucky we got a new van so they don't know who we are. Wouldn't the card give that away? So we eventually came to our last house and as we drove up to their house dogs started barking and we were scared it endangered the mission (star wars quote). We quickly jumped out of the car and started to pet the dogs to calm them down. They stopped barking so we walked up to the door with the dogs following us. The whole time I was worrying when we ran back, the dogs would chase us and take us down. So the time came and we ran back to the car, I glanced behind me and the dogs weren't following me. The mission had been accomplished succesfully. We drove a couple of minutes then turned around and went to drive past the house to make sure they got the cookies. It was then that it hit us. The dogs were outside, cookies in the open, and they didn't follow me back. We quickly drove back to the house and jumped out of the car. About half way to the door the dogs bolted revealing the plate empty and the card in their yard. It was then when I lost it. I have not laughed that hard in a long time. I went back to the car and told my parents the cookies weren't there. Their response was good! They heard the door bell! I was laughing so I couldn't tell them what really happened. It wasn't until my brother brought back the plate full of dog slobber. Our whole family then proceeded to laugh. It was then that the owners answered the door. I sent my brother to go tell them what happened, I couldn't because i was still laughing! We then drove home laughing all the way. I would have to say, this is the best Valentines Day I have ever had!

Church Dance

This might  be a short post but oh well. As you probably have noticed i've added music to my blog. Well the song that is playing (most likely while you reading this) is by the Jonas Brothers. They play it at every church dance and it is like, impossible to dance to. Well about half way through the song the acoustic guitar stops followed by electric guitar and screaming... yeah about that... So when this song came on me and my friend Nathan decided to put our own twist on it. We waited until the electric guitar came and we both ran slid on our knees and played air guitar. It was hilarious to watch but rather painful for me and Nathan. It wasn't until then when we realized the gym floor wasn't so slippery. Both our knees were bright red and burning. Of course as we both got up with big smiles on our faces we didn't take notice to the major floor burns we just gave ourselves. We danced the night away until it was time to go home. We were sitting in the car when Nathan let out a yelp and shoved himself back into his seat. He looked over at me with pain in his face and pointed to his knees. I laughed so hard that I leaned forward, just as Nathan did, and let my knees hit the seats in front of me. I let out a yelp of pain and quickly jolted back, almost mimicking Nathan. The whole ride home we had amazing posture as we sat straight up in our seats, like the gentlemen we are.

Seminary

So getting up every single morning at 4:45 is hard. And to go to a class and stay a wake for that long is even harder. So getting there takes a lot of will power, and your parents threatening to ground you. Our seminary class is located in the basement of my friend Chris's house. His room is right around the corner so he has the easiest job, walking two feet from his bed to one of the chairs. And recently every morning he has gotten up, showered, and layed in his bed, asleep during seminary. So today we decided to get proof, to show his parents exactly what he was doing during seminary. The idea came to me when I found his video camera laying next to his bed, I picked it up and was so happy when it had a full tape ready to serve justice. We took the camcorder and started by filming him asleep in bed and then every twenty minutes we filmed the clock and then his empty seat. Our teacher was all for the idea, he was as excited as we were to finally tell on him. So 6:45 came and we filmed him getting out of bed and walking upstairs, now it was time to show his parents. We took the camcorder to his  mom and she laughed pretty hard. THEN chris served the consequences, and JUSTICE WAS SERVED.

The Dryer, I Mean THE Dryer

So a couple of weeks ago me and my brother went into the bathroom at Target. The hand dryer there was intense. It was called  the Xelerator. This thing blows so much air out, so fast, that your skin on your hand moves around. It is painful when you have your hands too close. So every time we go there we play around with it, sticking paper towels in the dispenser and seeing them shoot out and intelligent things like that. We got so much joy it was hilarious. Then the about a week ago me and my brother were sitting at home talking when we came up with the idea, how would it feel to stick your face under that dryer... What exactly would that feel like... the wind rushing past your face... the feeling of freedom. Today is when I experienced the dryer and i took the chance and stuck my face under the dryer. The feeling of wind rushing past your face, hair blowing around, the stinging brute force of the wind. It was amazing... I have never experienced that much force from a small hand dryer, i'll remember the date, write it down in my journal, January 27, the first day i stuck my face under THE hand dryer.

Rocket Launch

So today we had a get together with a group of friends and we had leaders from our church join us for our "adult" supervision to launch model rockets. The first ridiculous part of the morning was it was negative, let me repeat NEGATIVE six degrees without windchill. AND the launch site had a good two to three feet of snow covering the ground. So we all came with light spring jackets and tennis shoes and made our rockets. There was a wide range of sizes of rockets and each requiring different engines. The biggest rockets usually take about a engine 5. And the smallest one takes a 1. So we all launched our rockets successfully and got a lot of joy! Then we realized, crap, we cant feel our hands or feet. We all ran through the field back to the house and dethawed. Then of course we went out again, but this time we were prepared, we wore plastic bags over our feet! And thats just the start of it. So for the finale we put an engine 5 into a rocket that takes an engine 1. We figure well it'll either blow up, land on a roof, or hit one of us leaving us severely burned. Well why not try it! We launched the rocket and it automatically spazzed out and we all hit the ground. It flew over our heads in circles until ending up smashing into the ground burying itself two feet into the ground. We all laughed of course, not thinking at all what really could have happened to us. So overall it was a typical teenage guy get together! I wonder what's going to happen next...

So my mom just got photoshop for the mac and i just couldn't resist messing around with it, heres some of the pictures i made...

Finally I Post Something

So for the longest time i've been trying to come up with something to put on here but have never really come up with anything! But today I had a wonderful idea! Why not write about how wonderful a teenagers life is! Or to be more specific the wonderful/mindless life of a teenage GUY. So today me and a group of friends were stuck in a room for three hours and we about lost it. So we had to find SOMETHING to do. That's when my friend Shelby spotted a small cupboard in the corner of the room. That's when we had the idea... Lets see if each of us can fit in there! So we proceeded to make a barrier, hiding the person getting in the cupboard and see if we could fit! We quickly figured out that if you went in feet first, twisted your body so it was parrallel with the wall then you could easily slide in and shut the door. Just in case you were wondering, we all fit successfully! This was just one thing we did to keep ourselves occupied. The whole cupboard act got old real fast. So our next game... Hoodie Basketball. The point of this activity is locate someone with a hoodie on in the room and shoot small paper balls, and adding points if the ball lands succesfully in the hood. This game takes a lot of skill and practice. AND to add on to the fun, you get to see the persons reaction once they find all the small pieces of paper in their hood. As you can see we got a lot out of the lesson and came out of the class very confident in our knowledge of the history of the past presidential inaugerations. Overall it was a very good day